Relationships are probably the trickiest. I think getting caught up in what a relationship doesn't have that you think it ought to is a huge cause of often unnecessary discomfort. Keeping in mind this doesn't really relate to how you think you should be treated. That expectation is always your own to manage. This is about putting an expectation on how a relationship should be, develop, endure and fulfill you.
I remember many times meeting someone and wanting to be closer to them. It's a challenge. You have an idea of how important you could or should be to someone and then try to fabricate the conditions. Usually that effort is not just wasted, it's counterproductive to getting what you thought you wanted.
Today I was spending time with a friend. There are a lot of complicating factors around this particular friend, but the one I most often despair over is that I think she's perfect in every way, and she's happily in a relationship with someone else. I've honestly never met a woman who forces a smile on my face the way she does. I believe that I could end up seriously and irretrievably in love with her, and every time I walk away from seeing her I get upset that it can't be the way I want it.
Starting today I'm going to try something a little different. I'm going to try and appreciate what's really special about our friendship. That I'm always laughing, that I'm always happy and that I always want to spend more time. I'm going to revel in and enjoy that as much as I can, and try not to wish and hang on things that can't be. This is where this blog comes from. Don't focus on what's missing. Appreciate what you have.
I have an amazing friend who makes me feel alive. Day 2, in the bag.
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